HILARIOUS!

I always LOVE to read what my students write, especially when I can choose a topic that will invite some humor. Today, I asked them to write a letter to Santa Claus. I gave them an envelope and told them to seal it up and I would send it straight to the North Pole. (Is lying okay in the context of Christmas, because I told my share of them today.) I totally expected to hear a few "There is no Santa Claus!" comments from several of them. My first class said nothing. They seemed so excited to get to write a letter asking for special things for Christmas. The other class...not so much. I heard the comments during this class period. After reassuring them that I believed (ha), I said that if they didn't, to write a letter to whoever they thought Santa was. Here's what I got. Brace yourselves.

And I quote...(spelling/grammatical errors intact)

Dear Fake nonreal Santa,
I don't beleive in you because you're a over weighted large person who goes down chimnys. You would get stuck in chimnys because you suposedly eat cookies that kids who are not me belevie in you. Christmas isn't about you Its about God and Jesus you shouldn't steal children away by giving them presents. You better stay away from my house because Christmas is about God not you. But I also sorta beleve in you because I feel terible being mean to you if you exist. If your real please don't put me on the notty list because I'm realy a nice person.

Sincerely,
Nonbeliever #1

Hold on readers, because this one is unbelievable!

Dear fake Santa
I do not belive in you because you would get stuck in the chemnie cause you eat so many cokiees save one for me pig. (OH MY WORD!!!) Plus I pulled your beard in the mall when I belived in you and it flew to the end of the picture stand. and, by the way I put up video cameras so you can't turn me into a elf and work for you at the office I am onto you chubbie.

P.S. save me one cookie

By: Nonbeliever #2

I think it's safe to say these two letters made me laugh more than anything I've ever read in my entire teaching career. Made my day!!!

P.S. And they just thought they could be rude to Santa since I was "mailing them straight to the North Pole." Oh how they would feel if they knew I read those words. Negotiations are in the works for a "Operation Get Back at 'Em." A letter from "Santa" explaining his disappointment in their attitudes? A phone call from "Santa?" Ideas appreciated.